Today I wanted to blog about how thankful I am that God gave me such a wonderful mother; and awesome sister and gave me a great love and appreciation for animals.
Growing up, I never had many friends...one or two, here and there; but they usually had a ton of friends and I was always put on the back burner, a sort of 'back up' friend...you know; if they're not busy and they're bored they'd call me and ask if I wanted to hang out.
So now; at the age of 21, I've come to accept that I may never have super close friends that always want to hang out (like my brothers have).
Sometimes I wonder if God knew that this is how my life would play out (He does know everything) because I was blessed to have the coolest mom; not just a mom, but a friend...I love hanging out with my mom, she is a friend I never had, she's there to talk to, to go shopping with, to see a movie....just like my sister, Samantha.
Samantha and I are (roughly) 19 months apart. We have always been close; liking the same movies, animals, books, songs...colors. She IS my best friend.
All my life I've had a love and passion for animals.
When all I could do is crawl, mom says, I'd chase the cats around the house wanting to hold and pet them. I loved Zoboomafoo and The Wild Thornberries. Every time we'd go to the library mom had to limit the books I could get because I'd have a stack of 30 or more books about animals.
While everyone else was wanting a Game Boy Color, I wanted a cat.
For a while; I wanted to own my own zoo; lions, lemurs, tigers, elephants, crocs, etc.
There was a year I was kind of mad at God for making me love animals so much; they cost money, they limit what you can do, and it makes me sad to think about any of my animals dieing.
But then...I realized how much I NEED my animals...when I feel alone, hated, ugly, useless...when I am mad, upset, sad, scared...they're there.
Most girls have a friend to call; I never did, I only had my animals (there are some things you don't want to talk to your sister and mom about).
And when I felt sad or angry (whatever), and I'd bury my face in my cat or dog...goat, horse, sheep...etc. I'd get a comforting feeling about me...like God was holding me in the biggest and best hug one could get...I know we're not suppose to need anything other than God, but...every time I look at my animals I remember how amazing God is...when I feel the love for my animals, I can't even begin to imagine the love for ones child...and then when I think about Jesus...it almost makes me feel sick with sadness that fills my heart...
God loves me more than I can love anything, and He sent his son to die for me!
God knows me better than I know myself. He knows humans need friendships, that it's not good for us to be alone.
God blessed me with two best friends that I know will always be there for me, friends that will never put me on the back burner, and will never use me as a backup friend.
Sometimes we need to step back and try to think about why God has your life playing out the way it is.
"For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." ~Jeremiah 29:10-12
"The Lord directs the steps of a christian. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand." Psalms 37:23-24