Tuesday, September 21, 2010

100th Post!

Yeah! I have now blogged 100 times!!!!
Sadly I don't have much to say....Yesterday I started canning our sweet potatoes- right now we have 13 quarts with still more to be canned...Coraline is now staying outside! Last night was he first night outside.
Everything is starting to change into fall colors.

*Sighs*.......I've been feeling down, thoughts such as "Will I ever do anything with my life?" "What's my purpose?" "Am I ever going to get any where with my life?"
I know God has a purpose for us all, I know he has plans for me and that I must be patient in and seek the Lord. 

"Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." Psalms 27:14.

"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes." Psalms 37:7.

But it's hard....all I want to do is live and feel free and that I'm not wasting my life. All I want to do is ride-but I'm not very good at that. All I want to do is run-but our land isn't very big......want, want, want, want, need, need, need...I sound selfish, I have a very loving family, the best of friends, I have a roof over my head I have horses! Along with an ark of other animals!
I don't know...When all of your friends and cousins are going to collage, it's like, Oh, I should be too....but then I face facts, I want to be a stay at home mom- yes I want to run a small buffalo ranch along with raising some horses, but most of all, I just want to be a wife and mom- I don't want a job outside my home. So why waste the money on collage? Because the world is telling girls like me it's wrong to just want to be a mom. That we're lazy, not smart, unsocial, ect...When I visit family and my Aunts and Uncles are asking my collage going cousins questions, and I'm hearing all they've done with there lives already I'm like, I should go to collage. But I'm never going to go to collage because deep down, facing the facts, I don't want to...And yeah, I have to put up with friends disappearing and putting me behind there collage friends; OK, I get it. Yeah I'll have to put up with friends leaving for four+ years, fine.
I feel God wants me to be a stay at home mom. After all, I'll be raising the next generation, and look at all the children that (from the moment they were born) were enrolled in day cares because the parents were to busy working. Rude, mean, NOT Polite, uncaring people are out there (And I know, not all children turn out like this, but just think about it)...so yeah, I'm feeling a little woe is me lately....I'll get over it.

Gabrielle W.
"The Lord directs the steps of a christian. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand." Psalms 37:23-24

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